Confessions from the Homefront

1. Cling wrap is an art form - and I suspect Impressionism might be easier to master.
2. If you drop a 32-ounce jar of minced garlic on the floor, some if it will somehow end up on the ceiling.  And some in your nose.
3. Those disposable Gladware containers reproduce in dark cupboards - and they feed the lids to their Gladware young.
4. The outlets in all three bathrooms are not functional, and we're too proud to have our electrician come out and charge us $60 to reset the breakers.  For a third time.  Because we can never remember how to do it.
5. If eating two Fiber One bars for breakfast upsets your stomach, I don’t recommend following it with a lunch of undercooked red beans and rice.
6. Make sure the burners are completely cool before  using the stove-top as a staging area for baking ingredients.  Five pounds of sugar formerly stored in a Ziploc is not a fun cleanup.
7. There aren't enough old dance costumes in the house to satisfy a five year old with a DWTS obsession.  We need more sequins, stat.